Movember — Men’s Mental Health, Home Care and Why the Conversation Matters
Every November, millions of people around the world grow a moustache, run, walk and fundraise in support of Movember, the global movement dedicated to changing the face of men’s health.
Since its founding in 2003, Movember has raised over £800 million worldwide and funded thousands of projects focused on prostate cancer, testicular cancer and, perhaps most importantly, men’s mental health and suicide prevention.
Because behind the moustaches and the fundraising events is a deeply serious reality.
Men are significantly less likely than women to seek help for mental health problems. They are less likely to talk about how they are feeling. Less likely to visit their GP. Less likely to reach out when things become too much to manage alone.
And the consequences of that silence are devastating, suicide is the leading cause of death in men under 50 in the UK, and men account for approximately three quarters of all suicides.
At Homelium Care, Movember feels personal. Because the men we support, both the older adults in our care and the carers who support them, are at the heart of everything we do. And this November we want to talk honestly about men’s mental health in the context of home care, ageing and the caring profession.
The Older Men We Support — A Hidden Mental Health Crisis
For many of the older men Homelium supports at home, mental health is a subject that has never been talked about openly. They grew up in a generation where men simply got on with things. Where feelings were private. Where asking for help, of any kind, was not something that came naturally.
And now, in later life, many of them are facing circumstances that place enormous pressure on their mental and emotional wellbeing, often without the tools, the language or the support networks to address it.
Loneliness and isolation- Loneliness among older men is one of the most significant and most underreported mental health issues in the UK today. Men are less likely than women to maintain social networks as they age, friendships that were built around work, sport or shared activities often fade after retirement or following a health event. And when a partner dies, many older men find themselves profoundly isolated, often for the first time in their adult lives.
Research from the Campaign to End Loneliness shows that loneliness is as harmful to health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, increasing the risk of depression, dementia, heart disease and premature death. And for older men who have never talked about feelings or asked for support, that loneliness can become a serious and silent crisis.
The loss of identity and purpose- For many men, identity has been closely tied to work, physical ability and the role of provider and protector throughout their adult lives. When health deteriorates, independence is reduced and the ability to do the things that once defined them begins to diminish, the psychological impact can be profound.
Accepting care can feel like a fundamental loss of identity for some older men. The idea of needing help with personal care, with getting dressed or with tasks that were once completely within their control can be deeply difficult to come to terms with. And that difficulty, if left unacknowledged, can manifest as withdrawal, irritability, low mood or a quiet but serious decline in mental wellbeing.
Bereavement and grief- Older men who have lost a partner are at significantly elevated risk of depression and deteriorating mental health and are significantly less likely than women in the same situation to seek support or talk about how they are feeling. The loss of a life partner is devastating at any age. For an older man who may have relied on his partner as his primary source of emotional support and social connection, that loss can be catastrophic.
Physical health and mental health — the inextricable link- Physical health conditions, heart disease, Parkinson’s, stroke, cancer, chronic pain, have a profound and well-documented impact on mental health. Depression is significantly more common in people with serious physical health conditions. Anxiety about the future, about dependency, about what lies ahead is a natural response to a serious diagnosis.
And yet for many older men, these emotional responses are never addressed either because they do not raise them or because the healthcare appointments they attend focus entirely on the physical.
The Signs That an Older Male Client May Be Struggling
For Homelium carers who support older men at home, recognising the signs of deteriorating mental health is a genuinely important skill. These signs are often subtle and very different from the way distress might present in a female client.
Changes in behaviour- Increased withdrawal from conversation, reduced interest in activities they once enjoyed, sleeping more than usual or a noticeable change in the rhythm of the day.
Increased irritability or frustration- For men who are struggling emotionally, irritability is often the most visible sign, a short fuse, snapping at carers or family members, frustration at small things that would not normally cause a reaction.
Neglecting personal hygiene or nutrition- A decline in self-care, not bothering to eat properly, losing interest in getting dressed or maintaining the routines that once felt important, can be a significant indicator of low mood or depression.
Unusual comments about the future- Any comments about not wanting to be a burden, not seeing the point, or that things would be better without them deserve to be taken seriously and communicated to family members and healthcare professionals immediately.
Physical complaints without a clear cause- Depression and anxiety in older men frequently present as physical symptoms, unexplained aches and pains, fatigue, digestive problems, rather than emotional ones. These should never be dismissed.
How Homelium Carers Support Men’s Mental Wellbeing
At Homelium, the emotional wellbeing of our clients is not secondary to the practical care we provide, it is woven into the fabric of every single visit. And for our male clients in particular, the consistent, familiar, genuinely caring presence of a Homelium carer can make an enormous difference to how they feel about themselves and their lives.
Building genuine relationships- The most powerful thing a carer can do for an older man’s mental health is simply be a consistent, reliable and genuinely warm presence in his life. Showing up at the same time, every visit. Remembering what was talked about last time. Taking a genuine interest in his life, his history and what matters to him. These are not small things, for a man who may otherwise go days without meaningful human contact, they are everything.
Creating space for conversation- Our carers are trained to be attentive listeners, to pick up on what is said and, perhaps more importantly, what is not said. They create the kind of relaxed, comfortable atmosphere in which a client might feel able to share something they would never raise with a family member or a healthcare professional. Sometimes a conversation over a cup of tea is the most therapeutic thing that happens all week.
Noticing and flagging- Because our carers visit consistently and build a deep familiarity with their clients, they are well placed to notice when something has changed. When a client seems quieter than usual. When the spark has gone out of someone’s eyes. When the jokes have stopped. These observations are communicated to families and healthcare professionals and in some cases, they lead to interventions that make a genuine difference to a client’s mental health and overall wellbeing.
Encouraging social connection- Our carers encourage and support clients to stay connected, whether that means accompanying them to a community event, helping them make a phone call to a family member or simply ensuring that the visit itself provides the social connection that is so protective of mental health.
The Male Carers of Homelium — Their Mental Health Matters Too
Movember is not only about the men receiving care. It is also about the men providing it.
The care sector has historically been and remains, predominantly female. Male carers are a minority in the profession and as a result, they can sometimes feel isolated within their own teams, or find that the challenges specific to their experience as men in care are not fully acknowledged.
Caring is emotionally demanding work. It involves bearing witness to vulnerability, loss, suffering and death in ways that most professions never ask of their employees. It requires enormous reserves of empathy, patience and emotional resilience. And it can take a toll, on anyone, of any gender.
For male carers, who may have been socialised to believe that expressing emotional difficulty is a sign of weakness, that toll can build silently. The emotional weight of end of life care, of supporting someone through dementia, of forming a genuine relationship with a client and then losing them, these are not things that simply wash off at the end of a shift. They stay with you.
At Homelium, we want every member of our team, male and female, to feel able to talk about how they are doing. To raise concerns. To ask for support when the weight of the work becomes heavy. Because a carer who is supported and well is a carer who can give their very best to the people they look after.
To every male carer in the Homelium family this Movember:
You are doing extraordinary work. The gentleness, the patience and the genuine care you bring to your clients every single day matters profoundly, not just to them, but to the families who trust you with the people they love most.
Please talk. Please reach out. Please never feel that asking for support is anything other than the bravest and most sensible thing you can do.
What You Can Do This Movember
Check in on the men in your life, properly- Not a quick “you alright?” but a real conversation. A visit. A phone call that has time in it. Many men will not reach out when they are struggling, but they will talk when someone makes the space.
Encourage older male loved ones to see their GP- Men are significantly less likely than women to attend regular GP appointments and many serious physical and mental health conditions are picked up far later than they should be as a result.
Gently encouraging the men in your life to keep up with their health checks could genuinely save their life.
Talk openly about mental health- Normalising the conversation around mental health, in families, in workplaces, in care teams, is one of the most powerful things any of us can do. The more ordinary these conversations become, the more likely men are to have them when it counts.
Support Movember- Visit www.movember.com to find out how to get involved, whether through growing a moustache, taking part in a fundraising challenge or simply donating to the cause.
Useful Resources for Men’s Mental Health
Movember — www.movember.com
Mind — www.mind.org.uk | 0300 123 3393
Samaritans — www.samaritans.org | 116 123 (free, 24 hours)
CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) — www.thecalmzone.net | 0800 58 58 58
Men’s Health Forum — www.menshealthforum.org.uk
How Homelium Can Help
If you are concerned about the mental wellbeing of an older male loved one at home or if you would simply like to find out how Homelium’s home care could support him to live well, stay connected and feel genuinely valued, our friendly team is always here for an honest, no-pressure conversation.
Every new client receives a free care assessment and 2 hours of complimentary home care
📞 0333 3448 677 ✉️ hello@homelium.com
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